Saturday, September 09, 2006

"Self destruct"

Whatever I say at this moment in time is not going to be positive, remember, only the people that read this blog are seeing the real me, even the people who think they know me don't get to read this blog, maybe they will one day ??

I have been up for two days, I have canned nearly a litre of brandy, pigged out on at at least half an ounce of rocket fuel which i'm not proud of, and am sitting here wondering what it feels like or even remembering what it feels like, to have some real loving, and to have someone make love to me, and me not be looking at the side of the bed for money !

That would be nice.

roxyfoxy @ 7:56 pm


Comments:
Kiss & hug!
 
ouch 15g's of chop...
That's got to hurt your hooter
 
To be fair no ! i got up this morning and felt fine although just got in my car and there must be half a g all over the seats and gearstick Oooops !
 
Thanks Sade im fine today crisis over until the next time !
 
Aaah hon, your blog is so bitter sweet. Sending a hug for what it's worth.
 
A virtual hug back x
 
"Live with compassion
Work with compassion
Die with compassion
Meditate with compassion
Enjoy with compassion
When problems come,
experience them with compassion."

Lama Zopa Rinpoche - 1946 Buddhist Leader
 
I really hope for you that you find love someday!
 
Buddhism i find very interesting my father and step mum over in Thailand are great buddhists.
 
Me too Sadie that would be the icing on the cake ! and the cherry !
 
Ah, with me, its alcohol. Thank The Lord for Absolut 40% proof. A couple of litres sees me through many a night. I know its bad, but what fun !
Mind you, being a supposed sportsman, I'm trying to keep off it. Succeeding, except when I'm working away and living in a hotel when temptations are too much.
 
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Cocaine, Champayne, Sex, Money and bullshit. Forget Belle De Jour, Bridget Jones who's she !! this is the real deal enjoy xx

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Where the hell do i start ! Well i give a mint blow job !! For now ill just say ive been on a bender for the last 10 years i work in the adult industry and i live a mad life.

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